I'm sorry to say that my first Tuesdays with Dorie adventure was flop. I mean I knew it wasn't going to be my thing because it had key lime juice in it (and we all know how I loath fruit in my desserts), but I expected at least for my husband to like it. I decided that I would taste it (and nearly puked) just to give it a fair chance, and he agreed with me that it was REALLY REALLY gross. Dianne of Dianne's Dishes chose Florida pie (what is Florida pie you ask? the devil's diarrhea.) for this week's dessert adventure, and I have to say an "adventure" it truly was. I halved the recipe because I knew an entire pie would go to waste, and came up with 4 baby pies.
They were so cute that I was actually tempted to try them (boy was that a mistake). The pie came together pretty quickly, and it was relatively simple so if it agrees with your palette it would be a great quick summer treat. I knew I was in trouble when while beating the raw egg yolks (*puke*barf*) for the key lime layer I couldn't help but gag every few seconds when the thought of consuming raw egg yolks would come to mind. Even grosser is that after I added the condensed milk and the key lime juice to the yolks to make the key lime layer I could still actually SMELL the raw egg yolks so I literally had to breathe through my mouth because the smell was sooo potent (i know what you are thinking, but trust me this was 100x worse than rotting strawberries). After almost puking several times making the key lime layer I was going to throw in the towel, but my ego wouldn't let me. I was going to finish this pie if it killed me (literally). I bake my little demon pies and then freeze them for an hour and took them out to tackle my next challenge. Meringue. DUN DUN DUN!
This has got to be hands down the grossest thing ever. I don't know if I've ever eaten fresh egg white meringue on anything before, but this experience has traumatized me and in the words of the great Chris Tucker I will "NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER" eat fresh egg white meringue again. Its the powdered stuff all the way for me. First of all you have to heat the egg whites before you beat them which again gives off this gross raw egg stench and then after you beat them they still smell all gross and egg like and you have to put them on these gross raw egg yolk pies. When i finally taste it not only can you taste the raw eggyness (shut up i know that is not a word) but the key limes are such a dominant flavor that you cant even taste the coconut so it was sort of like an eggy super tart (damn those key limes) lime pie (puke*gag* barf*).
That's enough about this pie because I'm starting to feel ill, but if I can save one person from traumatising their taste buds with this pie then the world will be a better place, and I have done my part. I have posted the halved recipe for the folks who have an iron stomach. You can find the full recipe here Dianne's Dishes. Be sure to stop over at the Tuesdays with Dorie blog to see how everyone else's pie turned out. Also after every new adventure we are suppose to ask ourselves if we would make this again. My answer? Not even if I could never buy another pair of shoes again unless I did.
Disclaimer: This pie may not be as bad as I think it is (unless you have an aversion to raw egg products like I do then its probably right on), but this is my little blog world and my word is law;)
Florida pie or as I like to call it "The devil's diarrhea"
Mini pie crusts (I used 4)
2/3 cup Heavy cream
3/4 cup shredded coconut
7 ozs condensed milk
1/4 cup lime juice
2 tablespoons sugar
Getting Ready: Center a rack in the oven and preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Put the pie plate on a baking sheet lined with parchment of a silicone mat. Put the cream and 1 cup of the coconut in a small saucepan and bring it to a boil over medium-low heat, stirring almost constantly. Continue to cook and stir until the cream is reduced by half and the mixture is slightly thickened. Scrape the coconut cream into a bowl and set it aside while you prepare the lime filling. Working with a stand mixer, preferably fitted with a paddle attachment, or with a hand mixer in a large bowl beat the egg yolks at high speed until thick and pale. Reduce the mixer speed to low and beat in the condensed milk. Still on low, add half of the lime juice. When it is incorporated, add the reaming juice, again mixing until it is blended. Spread the coconut cream in the bottom of the graham cracker crust, and pour over the lime filling. Bake the pie for 12 minutes. Transfer the pie to a cooling rack and cool for 15 minutes, then freeze the pie for at least 1 hour.
To Finish the Pie with
Meringue: Put the 4 egg whites and the sugar in a medium heavy-bottomed saucepan and heat over medium-low heat, whisking all the while, until the whites are hot to the touch. Transfer the whites to a stand mixer, fitted with the whisk attachment, or use a hand mixer in a large bowl, and beat the whites at high speed until they reach room temperature and hold firm peaks. Using a rubber spatula, fold the remaining 1/2 cup coconut into the meringue. Spread the meringue over the top of the pie, and run the pie under the broiler until the top of the meringue is golden brown. (Or, if you've got a blowtorch, you can use it to brown the meringue.) Return the pie to the freezer for another 30 minutes or for up to 3 hours before serving.